The world's not enough

I lead a good life. I've built it myself and im for most parts proud of it. I try to stand straight for my misstakes and learn from my wrong doings. And the one thing that is always important is that I try my utter most to always be there for my friends. New friends, old friends, my friends friends, friends I've never met, people I've agreed to be friends with.. And I honestly do my utter most and best since I reckon this to be a defining point of character. And because of said statement I am now drinkin wine with one of my friends, condemning the outside world. Not just because it is a generally shitty place and at some point everyone's eventually had enough, but because from my part I have partially lost hope. And I grieve my hope. I want to think good about things - and people. But when the people you really need that from can't provide, you are the one ending up at a loss. I grieve my faith. But am hoping it will return to me, this it not how I want things to be - and things usually turn up my way... eventually.
I would have been there when you needed it though.

For those of you who don't know the story yet. My grandfather is ill. Very ill. He has a chronicle lung obstruction and has now got an infection in his lungs which has rendered him a hospital stay since last sunday. Grandparents in general is always a sore subject I know, but I am serious, there is no other person for me than my grandfather. My brother, my grandmother, my cat, my best friend, I love them all to death, but my own personal universe is centered around my grandfather. He is my first memory. He is the one I talk to everyday on the phone. He is the one and only for me. I can not imagine the same realtionship with anyone - including my children - as to my grandfather. And now a disease is slowly taking his life before my eyes. And I can not do anything. I would give the world up for him, given only the chance. But I can't. And that is eating my insides out.

So if you ask, no, I don't feel at my best right about now. Far from it.

Fika med fröken Kruse-Bråhn idag vid villan idag. Helt perfekt aktivitet på en helgdag såhär. Och sol också ute, tackar.. Det var ju ett tag sen
Sen har jag massa bokslut att ta tag i ikväll.. För att inte tala om redovisning! Känns som om det kommer bli en lite längre lunch ;)

Not alone...

Yesterday, my flat was graced with the honour of having a very distinguished guest for a visit. Atleast - that's what it seemed like when he swayed his way into my home...

Granddad's at the hospital

Have had a rough few days now recently... Granddads been ill, so we've been in and out of the hospital and i've spent numeral hours sitting on a chair next to granddads bed. But then again, when he's ill there's no other place i'd wanna be but at his side.
Now he'll be at the hospital for a few days recovering from a severe lunginfection. Hopefully he'll atleast stay the rest of the week so he'll get enough time for a full recovery.
Thanks all of you who'd showed your concern for my granddad, it's really nice to see. And it cheers him up as well! :)

To those that makes the bad days a litlle bit better. It is well worth it. Eventually...

Guestinlay from Hanna

Hej!
Gästinlägg så att säga.
Jag hade tänkt mig en lugn hwemmakväkl med sushi, men Malin hade andra planer och här är jag efter 8 shots av tequila och har det ganhska bra!
Vi kollar på englnadsbilder och lä'ngtar tillbaka till undgdomens oskyldiga dagar.. bara hur bra hade vi inte det?!
Just det!
Tequila., bar med, liquid/envy och supersnygga svenskor.(VI)
Malin! Om jag har råd ska jag bjuda dig på en svän till england i sommar.
och vi ska ha sådär kyl soim vbara vi kan ha där!! >Snälla häng med d¨å.!!
iaf så ill jag bara söga att jag bara att jag ör såå glad att dte var just din mailadfress ajg fick av agenten och att vi träffades och har haft sp roligt tillsammans!
Love you, snart dags för den elfte,
xx
Hanna